Bernard is a simple-minded man who works as a waiter in a highway cafe, accidentally helping drivers who stop by with their little life problems.
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Bernard is not exactly what you'd call a smart man. He owns slip-on shoes because he can never remember how to tie shoelaces, and he owns shoelaces because he can never remember that he doesn't know how to tie them. Bernard saw a TV show once where people lived in a community and trusted each other so completely that they didn't lock their doors. He thought that was a brilliant idea, and having faith in human kind, he has never locked a door since. As a result, he can't keep a TV longer than two weeks, since his apartment gets robbed approximately twice a month. But this doesn't deter Bernard's trust in humanity. In fact, having quite the passion for brand new furniture, he sees losing most of his belongings as the perfect arrangement to justify remodeling his apartment constantly. He has become somewhat of a celebrity at his local furnishing department store, and after the fifth visit in two months, the manager created a special loyalty card just for him that reads Gaston's Home Decorator - Favorite Customer Secret Program. Proud to belong to a secret club, Bernard always checks behind him before handing his card to the cashier in what he thinks is utmost discretion. Not only does everyone know about the card, but they also have to muffle their laughter every time because Bernard's utmost discretion is really a contorted face with his tongue sticking out.
But Bernard is a nice man and his neighbors couldn't be happier. Since he moved in, not one of them has been robbed. Most of the people in the building just consider Bernard as free anti-theft insurance, except a few righteous souls who believe in karma and who regularly drop by his place to offer him compensation. On the first of every month, he gets freshly baked goods from the couple in apartment 3B. The granny in 2A shares her leftovers with him essentially every night, and every Monday morning, Bernard finds on his doormat whatever new creations the chef in 6D invented that weekend. This is how Bernard can afford to purchase so many sofas and coffee tables: he never has to worry about purchasing food.
Not that Bernard worries much. He used to worry that his fish, Admiral Anchovy, would one day be stolen. Admiral Anchovy's real name was actually Have-You-Fed-The-Fish-Honey and his real owners were actually Bernard's neighbors. The Trellmans had an argument, and Mrs. Trellman banished her husband's fish from their apartment, setting it outside on the rug. She had just read that morning an article about woman empowerment and that sometimes, wives had to be just fierce enough with their husband. Two minutes later, Bernard came home. Assuming the fish was lost, he took it to his apartment and decided it looked like an Admiral Anchovy. Two minutes later, Mr. Trellman opened his front door to retrieve Have-You-Fed-The-Fish-Honey. He looked back at his wife with such great astonishment and she looked back at him with such great puzzlement that they instantly forgot what their fight was about. Who could possibly want to steal a goldfish? The next morning, Bernard collected his mail and judged it a most bizarre coincidence that the Have-You-Seen-Have-You-Fed-The-Fish-Honey poster featured a fish just like his own.
But Admiral Anchovy was never stolen by robbers and Bernard was pleased to deduce that robbers have a conscience after all. Admiral Anchovy died of old age instead, and was replaced first by Brigadier Barbus, followed by Colonel Cod.